10 Things that I am Grateful for Today

There are many things to be grateful for but right now, right here I have challenged myself to think of 10 things that I am grateful for and to do it in 10 minutes.

1. That God loves me.
2. That both of my parents are still alive.
3. That I have two wonderful boys.
4. That I have a job that pays.
5. That I have freedom of worship.
6. That I have friends.
7. That I can speak to God at anytime and in any place.
8. That I have my health.
9. That it is summer.
10. That I will be on holiday next week.

Life is GREAT!!

That was too easy. It took only 3 minutes.

A Wasted Day

I try and I try, I really try,
I plan, I scheme, I even fight,
I do, I hope for I am right,
But yet, I cannot.

I try again I do not quit,
I go and throw quite a fit,
I get angry, I do not sit,
But yet, I cannot.

Now I am mad so very mad,
I have failed and I am sad,
Why oh why a day gone bad,
But yet, I cannot.

Now I stop to think, to ponder,
A wasted day in which I flounder,
Forgetting to pray, trust and wait,
For without God, I cannot.
© Priscilla Carvalho, May 2009.

Four months after cutting my hair

It has been four months since I cut my hair. How am I doing?

JUST GREAT!!! I do not believe it or could I imagine that I could feel so free.

So that you may understand my babbling I will have to make a confession. I straightened my hair. There, I said it. My mother started with the processing of my hair when I was 11 years old and I spent my entire adult life thereafter doing just that. I could not image a life without processed hair. Every 6-7 weeks I HAD TO GO to the hairdresser to get it straightened otherwise it became unmanageable, it started to break and it got fussy etc. Before I went to have it straightened, I had to wash it at least a week in advance, so I had to keep track of the weeks. With a full time job and being a single mother of two boys who lives alone, getting to the hairdresser was a struggle. I would say all the time that I was a slave to my hair. Oh did I mention that I could not wash it myself? At the point of cutting my hair I was just at my wits end. Now four months and 3 more haircuts later I finally feel like the weight has lifted. It is dawning on me what a burden it was to be straightening my hair.

At first I was excited by the brand new look. This turned to sadness as I became accustomed to the look and I felt that there could be no change. Now I am on the top of the world. I can wash it myself and it still looks good, I can get it combed in less than 30 seconds and get away without combing it on weekends. I do not have to consider the wind, rain or even the sea. For the first time since I was a child I was able to really relax in the sea. I lay floated and did as it pleased me while at the beach.

The main benefit to the hair cut it that I feel that I am not living a lie anymore. No more working so hard to give an image that was not really who I was. No more deception of what my hair is really like. I am now FREE!

12 Things that You Miss when You are Rushing Around

1. The smell of a fresh morning with a chill in the breeze.
2. The beauty of a garden filled with flowers, bees and yellow-breasted humming birds.
3. The joy of listening to your children at play.
4. Spreading joy with a smile.
5. The ego boost that comes from pampering yourself.
6. Ideas that come to you from the small things around you.
7. The joy of writing down your thoughts.
8. Feeling beautiful.
9. Eating healthy.
10. Meaningful Conversation.
11. Teaching important lessons to your kids.
12. Meditating on the Word of God.

What I learnt from a Dog

Tricks My Dog Taught Me.

If you love and own a dog or have owned one at some point in time then you will know how very beautiful there is a relationship that can assist between the dog and yourself. There were always dogs in my family. I recall there being a dog around the house from the time I was about 4 or 5 years old. Many tragedies have occurred over the years with the dogs but that did not stop us from owning a dog, so special is the relationship.

After I got married, had kids, subsequently divorced and moved into my own home, almost in that order, I bought my five-year-old son a dog for his birthday and then I got the same dog for my second child who was turning one year old at the time. Their birthdays are one week apart so there was one party. The household felt complete. That dog was so much a part of the family.

One day as I took my breakfast outside on the porch my dog ran up to me wagging his tail. At that very moment I had a thought. What if we as women could be this happy to see our spouses, our other half, wouldn’t this lead to a better relationship?

I explored this theory and wrote a book. Included in the book is an experiment I conducted as well as interviews that I did with men. My book is entitled Tricks My Dog Taught Me – A Smart Woman’s Thoughts on Saving a Relationship.

You can find an extract from the first chapter and get an opportunity to buy the book at www.tricksmydogtaughtme.com . It will enhance your relationship and it has done for hundreds of persons already.

Life without Television or Video Games

So the New Year has opened. One of those critical examinations that we have to do in life is looming and my kids are spending time staring at the television. I speak, I instruct, I give good reasoning explanations but they turn deaf ears to me. “Just until this program finishes or we just started the game or I cannot pause this game” are the replies that I hear. These replies went for everything that I had asked them to do and I was unable to get them to really setting and do homework, housework, to get dress or even to eat. I felt that I was fighting an unforeseen demon which was strong, powerful and had control of my children.

In total frustration I declared no television or video games until the summer holidays. My youngest (age 6) went through withdrawal symptoms. He begged, pleaded and even cried for days. I am not a cruel mother so I allowed the television on Friday nights, which is our family night and we do what we want just as long as we do it together. Then I started to see changes in ways that I did not expect. My youngest brought out a puzzle and because it was a 200 piece he asked for help. It turned into an extraordinary family time together. Then one morning he picked up a book that I had to force him to read the night before and started to read it. That was a miracle!!! He NEVER volunteered to read, ever! My oldest even helped me to hang out clothes without the urgency of returning inside that resulted in a poor job.

For me, the lack of constant blaring noises, the fact that the children actually hears me now and responds, that they are not so antagonistic about performing duties and the quality time that we actually spent together is God sent. They are forced to become more creative and to entertain themselves.

The only draw back is that they constantly want me to play with them now.

Earlier Morning Sound in Barbados

Hello, On one of my morning walks I recorded the beautiful sounds of birds in the morning. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.

On cutting my hair

So there I was two weeks before my 41st birthday sitting in the hairdresser’s chair. My mother is calling me to ask if it is over yet and the other customer is staring at me with her mouth opened wide. I was cutting off almost all of my hair. I always had long hair and reports have always informed me that I had lovely hair. I am conservative by nature and never dared to cut off my hair or try any real styles. But it was time for change.

I was feeling pressured in a schedule of work, kids’ activity and hairdresser appointments and I was sinking. Then three people that I knew died suddenly in a space of three weeks (two just dropped down dead and one had a stroke and died a week later). Layouts were imminent at the company where I work and no one knew who will stay or who will go.

I had always wanted to try a short spiky look so I though I would go for it. Let go of the pass. Look forward to the future. As the hair fell away the hairdresser asked me if I wanted to keep it. I did not. That would be holding on to the pass so I left it all at her place.

I was a little fearful of the responses that I would get especially from those who wanted me to swear I would NEVER cut my hair. I devised phrases and countermoves to answer the attacks. Then I ventured out into the new world. I had all kinds of comments and fortunately most were good. I even got more appreciation comments than usual from the ‘guys’.

I feel powerful now as I sport my new look. I even feel more classy, beautiful and stylish. I love the look and the easy and convenience that comes with being able to handle my own hair. People think that I did it as a new look for a new year but I did it because I could.

In a way it has strengthened me for 2009 with constant reminders of the recession, lost of investments and job loses. If I could cut my hair and survive then I am ready to face 2009, of course with God’s help.

How Beautiful is Beautiful

One Sunday every month I am scheduled to work with the babies at my church – Love and Light Ministries, in Barbados – and it is advisable to wear a pants. I had bought a blouse specifically for this task as I thought it would be suitable yet fashionable. I decided to wear it one Sunday in January especially since my two boys told me how lovely I had looked in it the last time I wore it. Personally it is not the type of blouse that would be my first choice when buying but as I said the criteria was appropriate for church and fashionable.

At the end of the service as I was packing up and cleaning up a friend in church told me how lovely the blouse looked. (So that totaled at least three people who told me this.) It made me think of just what is beautiful. I know that the blouse that I was wearing was similar to what this lady will wear. So yea she will find it beautiful.

There are so many variations in this world in all categories – cars, clothes, houses, shoes, bags etc. – and all seem to have an owner. And why is this? It is because we all see beauty differently and often what we consider beautiful comes as a result of how we were socialized and our personal tastes.

So why be bound by what we see on the television or in magazines that defines beauty. That is their version of beauty that they want to push on the rest of us, just so that we can buy the product. So be bold and step out with confidence knowing that your choice in life is BEAUTIFUL!

One Way to Handle the Recession

It is a fact that the world is in a recession. What are we to do? There are days I feel overwhelmed by what is happening; the “bread winners” in families losing their jobs, banks reclaiming houses, banks having to be bailed out, Developed Nations not being able to raise the funds that they require in a bond issue, fear on every turn.

I have decided that I will handle the recession by giving. Yes, I said giving. I will give of my ideas to others to help them get or maintain a job. I will give of my time to assist those less fortunate and I will give money to those that are in need. I know within myself that God’s word is true. In the Christian Bible in the King James Version it says in Ecclesiastes 11:1 "Cast thy bread upon the waters: for thou shalt find it after many days". I do believe that the more that I give the more I will receive because God is a faithful and just God.

In this time of scarcity I tell myself (it takes some convincing) that I have enough for others who are in need, my children and me. I believe that more will come my way the more that I give to others.

The spin off this giving is that I feel so great!! It makes my days happier.

New Year Resolutions

It is that time of the year for New Year resolutions. Here are mine:

1. To see things that happens in life differently i.e. to view life with new eyes. Instead of saying “Oh another pimple”, I shall say “Thank God for acne cream and foundation makeup” and move on.
2. To see failure as a stepping-stone to success. A good attitude and determination to rise again is required!
3. To stop worrying over the small things even if they appear to be large problems. “That to shall pass”.
4. To have the Faith that as a believer in Jesus Christ I have the promise in Romans 8:28 in the Christian Bible that says: “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
5. To recall that if I know how to worry I know how to pray (Oh boy, how much more prayers I will say in one day!)
6. To dedicate more time to pray. (This follows naturally from point five). Instead of seeking a human ear to listen to my problems I know that I always have the ear of God Almighty anytime day or night.
7. To offer everything that I am and have to God for him to use to his Glory. It is fruitless trying to hold on to what we have and to build wealth if God is not keeping us. Look at the great financial losses and lives that occur in 2008. The true and living God is the only one that preserves.

Put God first and you will have a happy and prosperous new year.